


One Condition

by controlofwhatido



Category: Glee
Genre: Cheerio Blaine, M/M, Mpreg, Skank Kurt Hummel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 13:42:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4437686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/controlofwhatido/pseuds/controlofwhatido
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So a while back, slightestwind and i were talking about mpreg (surprise, surprise) and it turned into skank!kurt & mpreg!cheerio!blaine. so, here it is. almost 2400 words and unbeta'd.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Condition

Blaine frowns when he pulls his pants up and they fit a little _too_ snugly around his waist. He tugs the waistband out and his frown deepens when there isn’t as much give as there used to be. He’s always _so_ careful when he washes his Cheerio pants – Coach Sue is going to absolutely murder him for shrinking them.

He sighs, deciding to forget about ruining his pants and just hopes that Coach Sue doesn’t notice.

Except when he tugs his shirt on, it’s snug around his middle, too. “Shoot,” he mutters, walking over to his mirror to look at himself from the side. He’s always had a little bit of a belly and no amount of grueling Cheerio practices have helped him get rid of it, but he knows he’s been eating healthy and if anything he’s been working out _more_ because they have a competition soon.

Running a hand over his stomach, he doesn’t really notice much of a change. He must’ve just really screwed up his laundry.

But the first thing that Coach Sue yells at him when he gets there for morning practice is, “Laps, Anderson! The last time I saw a belly like that on one of my Cheerios was when Quinn Fabray was pregnant!”

Blaine stumbles a little and dutifully _doesn’t_ look down at his stomach before he does a few quick leg stretches and takes off jogging. He didn’t dare step on the scale before he left, but he just doesn’t know how it’s possible that he put on a couple extra pounds.

Unless… _no_ , he shakes his head, tossing the idea right out the window. They _always_ use condoms when they have sex and besides, it’s probably been about two months since he bottomed.

He trips over his feet again, praying that Sue doesn’t notice his sudden clumsiness. He… there was that _one_ night. That one night where they were a little _too_ tipsy and neither of them had a condom on them and Blaine had just been so _horny_.

He can’t leave practice – Coach would immediately strip him of his Captain status – but he needs Kurt. Needs to see him as soon as possible. After his laps he mindlessly gets through the routine they’re working on (he ignores the glares he gets when his moves are admittedly a little sloppy) and as soon as Sue blows the whistle, he grabs his bag and hightails it for his car. He can afford to miss one day of classes.

Kurt’s already at the garage, having taken over the early shift since he graduated so he can be off work just in time for Blaine to be done with school and practices. By the time Blaine pulls up, all of the garage bay doors are open and he sees two cars up on lifts.

When he doesn’t spot Kurt immediately, he pokes his head in the office just in case and still no luck. “Kurt?” he calls out.

“Ow, _fuck_ ,” Kurt’s voice rings through the shop after a thud. “Blaine? What are you doing here?”

Blaine sees Kurt coming out from the other side of a car, rubbing the back of his head, a lock of pink hair already falling over his forehead. “I…” he trails off, looking around. There are only a couple of employees there at this early hour, but they both have already glanced over in his direction. “Can we go to the office? Somewhere private?”

Kurt’s brow furrows and he nods, tilting his head in the direction of the office door. “Sure,” he says, reaching for his ear – a nervous habit Blaine knows he still has, even though he quit smoking six months ago.

Once the door is shut behind them, Blaine lets out an anxious breath. “I… Kurt, there’s – “

“Blaine, just tell me what’s wrong, baby. Why are you skipping school?” Kurt steps closer to Blaine, rubbing his trembling hands up Blaine’s arms. “Why do you look like you’re going to puke? Oh… fuck, you’re not here to break up with me, are you?”

“What? No!” Blaine says, tucking in closer to Kurt’s body. “No, but you might want to break up with me after I tell you something.”

Kurt snorts and rubs his palm up and down Blaine’s back. “That’s not fucking likely, babe.”

Blaine takes a few deep breaths before closing his eyes and whispering, “I think I need to buy a pregnancy test.”

“You – what?” Kurt asks, tilting his head down closer to Blaine. “You need to buy a what? Babe, I didn’t hear you.”

“A pregnancy test,” Blaine says a little louder, flinching in anticipation of Kurt’s outburst.

Kurt freezes for a moment before leaning back slightly. “Why?”

Blaine can’t look Kurt in the eye, so he stares at his feet and shrugs uncomfortably. “Because I… think I might be pregnant.”

“H-how?” Kurt says, stumbling away from Blaine. “We’re always fucking careful!”

Tears prick in Blaine’s eyes, and his chest tightens with anxiety. He _knew_ Kurt wouldn’t react well. “Not…” Blaine trails off, feeling even worse because it was all his _fault_. “Not that one time. At that party.”

“Fuck,” Kurt says, scrubbing his fingers through his hair. “Well, it could be negative, right? We could be flipping out for nothing.”

Blaine shrugs again and shuffles over until he’s able to sit on the tattered couch that Burt refuses to trash. “I haven’t had any… morning sickness,” he mumbles. “But Sue took one look at me this morning because it feels like I shrunk my uniform and she just – she _knew_. And Coach Sue is rarely ever wrong.” A stray tear makes its way down his cheek and he hastily wipes it away. “I can understand… if you want – “

“ _No_ ,” Kurt says, sitting right down next to Blaine, almost in his lap. “Babe, no – never. Don’t cry, please don’t cry. You know I’ll cry too if you do.” He runs his thumb gently under Blaine’s eye before pressing a sweet, soft kiss to Blaine’s lips. “I’ll go with you to the store, if you want.”

“You can’t just leave work,” Blaine says, sniffling quietly. He heaves a deep breath and nods to himself. “I’ll… I’ll go. But – could you be there? When I take it?”

Kurt wraps an arm around Blaine’s shoulders, pulling Blaine toward his chest. “Of course, I’ll come over as soon as my dad gets here.”

Blaine shakes his head. “No, he’ll get suspicious if you up and leave. We can wait until after your shift is over.” The _last_ thing he needs is Burt on his case.

“I’ll just tell him you’re sick,” Kurt says, running his fingers gently over the neckline of Blaine’s Cheerio top. “He’ll be fine with it, I promise. He’s not going to think I’m going over to find out if you’re… pregnant or not.”

Blaine moans miserably and rubs a hand over his stomach. “What if… what if I am? What are we going to do?”

Kurt’s silent for a moment, the only sounds filling the office are Blaine’s occasional sniffle and the muffled noises from the shop. “Well, we take responsibility for it. Would you,” he pauses and holds Blaine closer, “would you want to… um, get rid of it?”

“I don’t think I could do that,” Blaine says, tucking his forehead against Kurt’s neck. “You’d make an amazing dad,” he whispers, fingers fiddling with the ( _artsy_ , as Kurt calls it) hole in Kurt’s pants.

Kurt snorts and shakes his head. “Well, it’s a good thing I stopped smoking already… really can’t be doing that shit around you if you’re pregnant.”

Blaine nods and pulls himself back up to a seated position. “I should… I should go and let you get back to work. I’ll see you this afternoon?”

“You’ll see me in a few hours, babe,” Kurt says, leaning across the couch to give Blaine a kiss. “And just… remember that I love you. No matter what happens with that test.”

*

Blaine rushes home, first. There’s no way he’s going to buy a pregnancy test wearing his uniform – he could just see it now in the headlines, _Another one of Sue Sylvester’s Cheerios pregnant??_ That’s the _last_ thing he needs.

His hands shake the entire drive to the drugstore, and he’s so thankful for the invention of self-checkouts so he doesn’t have to deal with the person behind the counter staring at him and judging him.

When he returns home, he keeps the test rolled up in the plastic shopping bag and tosses it on his bathroom counter. He knows Kurt will be here in an hour or two so he distracts himself with a huge glass of water and music videos on YouTube.

By the time Kurt gets to Blaine’s house and bounds up the stairs to Blaine’s room, Blaine has moved on from music videos to information and video clips about the stages of pregnancy. He also really, really has to pee.

“Hey, beautiful,” Kurt says, wrapping a hand behind Blaine’s neck before leaning in and giving him a kiss that might’ve easily led somewhere if they weren’t about to take a _pregnancy_ test. “How are you feeling?” he asks as he pulls away, eyes searching Blaine’s.

“Like my bladder is going to explode,” Blaine says, gesturing at his now-empty glass. “I should…” he trails off, looking toward his bathroom door. “I guess I should just go and get it over with, right?”

Kurt squats down in front of Blaine and takes Blaine’s hands in his. “Hey… if it’s positive, we’ll figure it out – okay? It takes two to tango, I’m not going anywhere.”

Blaine’s eyes sting with tears and he nods, pushing himself off his desk chair. When Kurt tries to follow him, he blushes and steps away. “I think I can do this part on my own,” he says, giving Kurt a tentative smile.

“Just trying to be a supportive boyfriend,” Kurt responds, stepping back and hopping up on Blaine’s bed. “Come out here when you’re done so I can hold you while we wait.”

After closing himself in the bathroom, Blaine stares at the bag for a moment before his bladder starts protesting to the point where he can’t wait any longer. It feels as if his entire body is shaking with nerves as he opens the test and hastily reads the instructions.

There’s not much to it besides pee and wait, and as soon as he finishes and sets the test on the counter, he washes his hands and hurries out of the bathroom, into Kurt’s waiting arms.

“How long do we have to wait?” Kurt asks quietly, rubbing a hand up and down Blaine’s tense back.

“Two minutes,” Blaine says, taking deep breaths to try to calm himself down. He supposes all of this anxiety isn’t good for the baby – if he’s actually pregnant.

“Hmm,” Kurt says absently, wrapping his arms tighter around Blaine. “What if he or she comes out with pink hair like their Papa?”

Blaine snorts and shakes his head – glad for Kurt’s ability to lighten almost any subject. “I’m pretty sure hair dye doesn’t affect sperm – they’ll probably be bald like you were or a curly mess like I was, ugh.” He groans and reaches up to pat his hair, which _had_ been gelled to perfection before he left the house this morning – now it’s just a mess. “I hope they don’t get my hair.”

“Either way, we’ll start off with the hair dye early,” Kurt says with a laugh. “They’re obviously going to want to follow in my footsteps.”

Blaine just rolls his eyes and is about to respond when his timer goes off. “Oh, fuck,” he whispers, heart stuttering in his chest.

“Hey,” Kurt says, lifting Blaine’s chin up so their eyes can meet. “Language,” he scolds – something he always does when Blaine’s the one who swears because it’s such a rare occurrence. “Do you want me to look?”

Blaine nods and sits up so Kurt can scoot off the bed. “Um… a plus sign means, well – positive.” He swallows hard and bites his lip nervously while Kurt heads into the bathroom.

It feels like an eternity has passed when it’s probably only been a few seconds before Kurt walks out, holding the stick in his hand.

“Well?” Blaine asks anxiously. He tries to stand up off the bed but his legs have apparently decided to stop working.

Kurt looks down at the test in his hand with a soft smile. “It looks like I’m going to have to learn how to dye a small child’s hair.”

Those weren’t the words Blaine was expecting and he’s confused for a moment before it really sinks in. “Oh my god.”

“You’re pregnant, babe,” Kurt says, setting the stick down on Blaine’s desk before sitting back down on the bed next to Blaine.

Blaine’s pretty sure Kurt can hear his heart with how hard it’s pounding against his chest. He doesn’t quite know how to feel – Kurt’s _you’re pregnant, babe_ echoing through his head. “What are we going to do?”

Kurt gently rests his hand on Blaine’s stomach and presses a quick kiss to Blaine’s cheek. “First off, I’m going to go make you some lunch because now you’re eating for two. And then? Well, we’ll figure it out. We always do.”

After the mention of food, Blaine suddenly realizes just how hungry he is. He nods and takes Kurt’s hand in his. “I’ll have this baby with you on one condition,” he says firmly, trying to keep the teasing smile off his face.

“Oh?” Kurt asks, eyebrow raised. “And what’s that?”

“No hair dye until they’re at least… five years old.” Blaine starts to lead them out of his room and downstairs before Kurt stops, tugging on Blaine’s hand.

“Five, why five? I think a three year old would look pretty badass with pink hair!”

Blaine just shakes his head and heads down to the kitchen, still holding onto Kurt’s hand. As much as he loves Kurt’s colorful hair, he’s pretty sure no child of his is going to go to preschool with anything but their natural hair color. Unless they make their own decision to look like Papa.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Reblog on [tumblr!](http://controlofwhatido.tumblr.com/post/125180605865/fic-one-condition-klaine-mpreg)


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